This is what we've been dealing with every night for the past week. I called the doctor today to find out why we're having such a hard time with Serif going to bed lately. About a week ago (really bad the past few days) Serif will be asleep when I go to put him in his bed. As soon as he hits the mattress, or even just before then, his eyes immediately open and he starts screaming. I don't mean whining or whimpering, he literally screams . . . like super mad! We're fine with letting him cry it out if that's what he needs to do, but we also don't want to just leave him if he needs reassurance and comforting. I've read that babies at this age realize they aren't attached to their parents and that they are their own being. This scares them and they don't understand that when you leave you're coming back. That being said, we couldn't take the uncertainty anymore and so we called the doctor to find out the best way to deal with this and what exactly is going on.
As soon as I started to explain the situation, the nurse says, 'Ahh, 9 months right? It's a classic case of Separation Anxiety'. Boy, that was easy but what do we do? She said it's fine to let him cry. She suggested maybe checking on him after 15-20 minutes. If he's still upset, we can go in and check on him, but don't talk to him, just make sure he's okay. Hopefully after several nights of routine, he'll get the idea of 'it's bedtime' and time to lay down and go to sleep. We'll see. I do know that I can't hold him all night (he's fine as long as I'm holding him) and he's not going to bed with us. He's always gone down pretty well by himself and just needs to relearn that he can do it on his own without our help.
Tonight was night one. He screamed for 15 minutes when Jeff went in to check on him. He was standing at the end of the crib crying. Jeff laid him down and kept his hand on his back (partly to keep him down and partly to comfort him). Within minutes he was asleep. Every time Jeff would raise his hand from him he would start to cry. After several times of this, Jeff left the room and shut the door. Serif cried briefly but then calmed down and fell asleep. May I add that I was in the living room praying that God would just give Serif a big squeeze and let him know it's okay to fall asleep.Just when you think you've got things down, things change. The nurse laughed a little today and said, 'Wait till he's 2!'. Good grief.
2 comments:
oh, my goodness. this sounds all too familiar! ella did the same thing! the minute she felt the mattress under her she woke up immediately, screaming just like you said serif is doing. it sounds like serif is already catching on to the routine you're starting that's great! ella got over this once she hit the big girl bed. :) after all....sleep is overrated. :)
seriously feeling emotional about that for you guys! i can just see you both praying for that little baby to be happy and sleepy with a hug from his daddy in heaven. ;)
i also felt it could be seperation anxiety and would suggest the same thing. evan was going to bed awake-ish but then at 9mo would cry 15min later. we'd go in and at first say 'shh, go to sleep' and lay him back down. another time we said nothing but layed him down rubbing his back. lastly, i started a month ago, saying, 'good night, see you in the morning' to him. even though he doesn't know what i'm saying, i think he understands and it's soothing to him that you're coming back, ya know? anyway, i'm sure i'm making stuff up but it's working for us right now (this week). just when we get it down, he'll change it up on us again. lol. you are great parents and are doing the best for your sweet baby. he knows you love him, that's why he doesn't want to go to bed, it's too cool to hang with ya'll! ;)
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